MY SPUTNIK.

“And it came to me then. That we were wonderful traveling companions but in the end no more than lonely lumps of metal in their own separate orbits. From far off they look like beautiful shooting stars, but in reality they’re nothing more than prisons, where each of us is locked up alone, going nowhere. When the orbits of these two satellites of ours happened to cross paths, we could be together. Maybe even open our hearts to each other. But that was only for the briefest moment. In the next instant we’d be in absolute solitude. Until we burned up and became nothing.” -SPSW

You may never know who am I and who Sputnik is but when the time comes that I'll have to reveal everything to you, I hope that everything will turn out just the way I wanted it to be.

I love you.. Just like a Sputnik.

I'm Back.

Good evening, It's been like what? A several months since I blogged once again. The reason why is that I wasn't able to gather all my thoughts once again and put it all together for you guys. I had a lot of things going on with school, friends and love and finally I have the enough time to check this one up once again and re-tell all my stories all over again.


If you'll ask me, "How's your heart lately?" Well to sum it all up to you guys, My life's still experiencing ups and downs of life. The only thing new to me is that, 4 and I are not together anymore. It was really complicated and all with her and 3. She found out that 3 and I have something going on while we're still together. Stupid I know. But still, people doesn't know how I really feel about this issue. I'm still sorry for everything if ever you guys will ever pass by to my blog. After everything that had happen, everything changed and I think change is good. I hope this could go on until my last breath.


College so far's really hilarious. I just flunked PE and I dont even know how that happened. My Psyhco bitch lesbian coach failed me and I dont even know why. Medicine course is hard I tell you, I'm starting to let go all of my parties every friday and all the shit that I had during my best days. Geez, how I miss all of it. Wish I could fast forward everything til I graduate and become a doctor and possibly have a boyfriend hihi.


O yeah, a month a go Philippines experienced a sudden climate change that everyone's talking about. Stupid Typhoon Ketsana ruined our 1st floor and my mom's car just right. It eerily dawned on me today, as dark clouds loomed in and rain started pouring from the sky, that it has been a month since Ondoy devastated most of Central Luzon.

EVERYTHING.. and EVERYONE. I MUST PRESS MY RESET BUTTON.

RIGHT.. NOW.

Indian Summer && Hard Candy

Last Saturday, I was at my friends house with my other friends and we discussed about Katy Perry. Yes, I really really adore Katy Perry and her beauty and Music. My friend randomly asked what was the best music video ever I said the Thinking Of You song and she surprisingly said that Katy Perry had a 1st version of the song Thinking Of You. I searched it on net and luckily I saw it.



After watching it I realized that the 2nd version of the song is much better than this.
<3>

Gays That Will Now Soar Separately

High school is over and done, I will never go back in that kingdom of happiness with those familiar faces that I always see everyday. The faces that I'm certain that they know me and I know them.. The faces that I know how to read them and I know which kind of cliques they go to. The teachers that never fail me to give a pain in the ass with loads of home works and quizzes to be studied right after school; teachers whom I know how they handle students from the very first day of my high school year. The environment, of course. People that I am dealing and dwelling with everyday, the people I always been with, the people who cares and accepts me for me..
At least, for now..
I love those people and I will never ever trade anything for the world.

Now it's time for the real world where you have to go by yourself from now on. The world that you have to make good decisions 'cause whatever path you choose, it will definitely shape your future.

My friends will still be there whenever there will be a get together parties and when you pass by them randomly in a mall. At least, you know that you still see them and that they will still greet you with warm hugs and kisses..

College will be different, no more groups of friends, no more familiar teachers and schoolmates.. Just YOU.

that's how we live our lives. No matter how deep the fatal loss, no matter how important the thing or person that has stolen from us -- that snatched right out of our lives -- even we are left completely changed people with only the outer layer of skin from before, we continue to play out our lives this way, in silence. We draw ever nearer to our allocated span of time, bidding off as it trails of from behind. Repeating often adroitly, the endless deeds of our everyday. Leaving a feeling of immeasurable emptiness.
*****
Maybe in some distant place, everything is already, quietly, lost.. Or at least there exists a silent place where everything can disappear, melding together in a single, overlapping figure. And as we live our lives we discover --- drawing towards us the thin threads attached to each -- what has been lost. I closed my eyes and tried to bring to mind as many beautiful lost things as I could. Drawing them closer; holding on to them. Knowing all the while that their lives are now fleeting away..
--- K

That's how life supposed to be.. NO FOREVER.

The Wind That Blew My Heart Away

It coulda been me and you together walking in the rain.
We coulda been making out and making plans to run away.
But here I am all alone outside and I really wish I told her everything that I was feeling inside.
Honor Society

In chapter one, you were my summer crush
Chilled at the beach from dawn to dusk
Under my umbrella

In chapter two, it got more serious
Changed from you and me to them and us
But we fell like the autumn leafs leaves
But the leaves got swept away
And the rain bled off the page

Please don't tell me this is the end of the story
Honor Society

So I've been thinking a lot this past 2 days about who should I pick and who should I leave miserable. In my past blog, the reason why I'm not in love anymore for the reason that I like someone else but I'm really afraid to tell that person nor tell it to my current boyfriend. The reason is that, I'm not sure if he'll give the same treatment or love to me and I don't think I'll be happy when I choose her. On the other hand, My boyfriend is the most amazing boy that I've ever been with despite the fact that we always have petty fights that turns into a big problem. He's to sensitive about the things around us and what's worst is that he misunderstood a lot of things and I'm afraid to let him see the other side of things. But despite all of her flaws, I still learn how to make my patience longer and learn how to understand what he's going through even though I know that it's over the edge already. In short, I love him dearly but I'm not in love with her anymore.

To the person that I like right now, he's really pretty and nice but I don't think I'd meet my expectations to him.

I'm really don't know who should I pick... But as I woke up a while ago, I realized that all this fling with that person is just there to fill me in whenever my boy and I have misunderstanding. You can call me a player but that's how I am. I'm the kind of person to keep things and lie about it because I know how the person will feel when I tell the truth. I don't want to hurt someone.

But I really need to make a choice and I hope whatever decision I make, I'll be certain.

At around 2pm, I texted the person and I said that this is goodbye. Even though I want to tell him what I feel about him, I know that things will get more complicated and both parties will be torn by my decision. I really do hope that fate and destiny will find our hearts again and renew what we have left behind..

If ever you're reading this, I hope that we could still be friends. I'm really sorry..
But I just stood there frozen and he got away.....